PLOTAfter returning home from White Castle, Harold Lee and Kumar Patel decide to travel to Amsterdam, Netherlands so Harold can surprise his neighbor and newfound girlfriend Maria. At the airport, Kumar argues with a TSA agent for searching him “because of the color of his skin” despite the agent being black. The duo encounter Kumar’s ex-girlfriend Vanessa Fanning, who is engaged to Colton Graham, a college friend of Harold’s whose family has political connections. The plane passengers mistake Kumar’s bong for a bomb and the duo are apprehended by sky marshals. Ron Fox, a neurotic and extremely racist Deputy Secretary of Homeland Security, believes the duo are agents of a joint Al-Qaeda and North Korean conspiracy and send them to Guantanamo Bay detention camp in Cuba. After narrowly avoiding a sexual assault by a guard at the detention camp, Harold and Kumar escape and board a Cuban refugee boat to Miami, Florida where they begin their trek to Texas, hoping Colton can clear their names.
Harold and Kumar endure several misadventures on their way to Texas, such as staying at the home of an incestuous sibling couple and their inbred son; escaping a Ku Klux Klan rally; and visiting a brothel with Neil Patrick Harris, who helps them evade capture from Fox but is shot. When they reach Texas, Colton agrees to help exonerate the duo. However, upon seeing Kumar reconnect with Vanessa, Colton instead delivers Harold and Kumar to Fox. On the flight back to Cuba, Harold and Kumar subdue Fox’s men. When Fox tries confronting them, he is knocked out by Dr. John Beecher (the Vice Chairman of the NSA) after Fox repeatedly treated him poorly. Dr. Beecher accidentally loses his footing, opens a door and falls to his death. Harold and Kumar escape via parachute, and Fox falls to his death while pursuing them. Harold and Kumar land in President George W. Bush’s estate. After smoking cannabis with Harold and Kumar, Bush pardons them. Harold and Kumar are escorted to Vanessa and Colton’s wedding by the Secret Service. They then expose Colton’s betrayal to Vanessa and the guests. Colton attempts to attack them, but Harold punches him out. Kumar consoles a furious Vanessa by reciting a poem he wrote for her in college; they reconcile. Harold, Kumar, and Vanessa travel to Amsterdam where Harold finds Maria, and the couples happily tour the city together while getting high on cannabis.